In Part 1 I looked at Tonya Reid’s take on the types of women that men want.
Unusually for such articles, she got things more or less correct and you’ll probably find the places where she and I disagreed to be instructive.
Now here’s Part 2 where she discusses the types of men that women go for. As with Part 1, my comments are between hers:
“The Bad Boy—He may not have a pot to p*ss in or a window to throw it out, but, if he’s a thug or some other type of bad boy, women will want him. BAD. They’ll wanna fight other women for him. They’ll wanna be his baby mama. They’ll wanna be the one that he settles for. Guess what? This dude’s not gonna settle! He loves the attention and he’ll play a woman as long as she lets him. And if you leave him? So what. There’s another woman waiting around the corner to take your place. Turns out he’s been seeing her on the side anyway.”
Yep, women really do love guys like this. It’s because they’re the take-no-prisoners leadership types that aren’t afraid to say what’s on their mind, go after what they really want and control the situation around them. Feminism hasn’t stamped out women’s intense interest in masculine guys who don’t conform and instead behave as they please.
The typical romance novel (i.e. porn for women) is filled with characters like this and the hero of any of these fantasies is always a lovable rogue who won’t take no for an answer.
“…
women claim they want a nice, well-behaved, well-mannered guy … but when they want to have fun
…”
Women claim they want a nice, well-behaved, well-mannered guy (and for long-term stability, they do!) but when they want to have fun, they always go for the bad boy. Trust me on this one …
And since you’re reading this, I’m going to speculate that you’re probably not yet very skilled at the art of being such an enchanting and addictive “character” for women. It’s not the end of the world, though. Read over this website and our free downloadable ebook for some very helpful advice on how to change your persona.
After all, if women can play “the slut” when it suits them (i.e. for having a good time), you too can most definitely play “the bad boy” for much the same reason.
“The Brainiac—Women are turned on by a certain part of a man where the bigger, the better. I’m talking about his brain, of course! We love a man who can challenge our intellect and enlighten us on a few subjects, whether it be politics, mechanical engineering, or whatever subject matter we’re lacking knowledge in. It’s sexy when a man can hold a stimulating conversation and actually look us in the eye. It doesn’t hurt when he can answer a few questions while playing Trivial Pursuit, either.”
She’s off the mark here, and catering to nerds who will now start thinking that they can “entertain” a girl with a detailed exposition of the Laws of Thermodynamics while meeting for coffee. Brains are good (I can be pretty nerdy myself at times) but simply trying to impress her with how much you know is going to bore her to death very quickly.
(Apologies to any nerd girls out there who actually do love hearing about science stuff, but you’re in the minority, I’m afraid.)
Would you be interested in her monologue on the finer points of shopping for shoes, an detailed update of her favorite TV shows, an exhaustive exposition of the big disagreement she had with her best friend last week, and so on? I didn’t think so.
So don’t talk about yourself
Get her talking about her, and believe me there will eventually be plenty of places you can demonstrate how intelligent you are with an appropriate comment, joke or story.
And don’t forget the primary reason women like smart guys is because there’s often a pretty good correlation between “being smart” and “having money”. Probably 95% of the time she won’t give a damn about the minute details of your $100k a year job, only that you do in fact actually have such a job. Such is life …
“The Charmer—Charisma is extremely important. Nobody wants to end up with someone who will bore them out of their skull. It’s important to us that our man is appreciated by our friends and loved ones. He should have the wit and charm to hold folks in awe for hours on end. We want to hear them say “What a great guy! I like him. When is he coming around again?”
I’m starting to repeat myself here, but the importance of good conversational skills can’t be understated. You can learn the basics on this site and via the downloadable ebook. And when you combine charm with being a “bad boy” you’ll literally have more women in your life than you know what to do with.
Yes, I know that sounds like a silly cliché, but if you’re not rich (and even if you are) it’s a lot easier to develop an attractive personality than it is to become a millionaire.
You’ve probably heard the saying that honey attracts more flies than vinegar, so start using honey. Begin applying a positive attitude, believe in yourself, and learn what you need to learn to successfully charm girls.
Good grief, I’m starting to sound like a braindead Dear Abby type columnist mouthing empty platitudes!
So I’ll stop. You know what you have to do.
“The Knight in Shining Armor—Let’s face it, women don’t like wimps. We want a man to protect us from danger, defend our honor, and carry our heavy groceries (not necessarily in that order). We want a strong man in our corner. Not that we’ll test him, but we basically want him to be able to kick someone’s butt if it comes down to that.”
Fire and a miss, Tonya. Sure, women want a strong man. But she’s lying when she says “Not that we’ll test him.” Women test the men in their lives on a regular basis, always with an eye to seeing if he’s really what she thinks (or at least hopes) he is. We discuss how to handle this in numerous articles on this site (check the Article Library for a listing) but to pretend that women don’t test men is highly misleading.
It’s true that women don’t want wimps, however
In fact, they’d love someone to act as an unpaid servant in all aspects of their lives (wouldn’t we all?). But just as I stated in Part 1, it works both ways. Do nice things for us, and we’ll do nice things for you. It’s called reciprocity.
The bottom line is this: don’t be a knight in shining armor without pay. Help her out, “save” her if you must, but expect something for your efforts. If she can’t or won’t reciprocate, cut your losses and move on. She won’t respect you as no-cost slave labor, and neither should you. Show some pride!
“The Perfect Man—Does he exist? Some seem to have found him. This is the guy who fits a good chunk of the checklist items of what we want in a man. Handsome? Check. Got a job? Check. Watches chick flicks without complaining? Check. He may have some little quirks that we think are cute, but overall he’s all that, and then some. Sometimes he’s right in front of us and we don’t even realize it.”
Scientific studies (never mind common knowledge, or my rants here on DRAM) have proven that women have significantly higher standards when choosing a partner, as compared to us men. This makes it significantly less likely that she’ll find someone who actually meets those standards.
“…
that’s inevitable, no matter how great she claims you are at this very moment.
…”
And it also makes it significantly more likely that she’s going to try and change you, for that matter. That’s inevitable, no matter how great she claims you are at this very moment.
But interestingly enough, the more you resist the changing process (you can astutely select which parts of you that you’d like changed — I personally recommend drawing the line at “enjoying” chick flicks) the more of a challenge you are and the higher you climb in her eyes. If you get domesticated too easily, you’re no longer interesting and — let’s face it! — it’s pretty much impossible for you to be truly perfect in her eyes no matter what you do.
Rather than trying to be perfect, you’ll be much better off cultivating a useful bad boy persona you can use as needed, plus enhance the latent charm you can apply to any situation at hand.
That will get you a lot farther than being “Mr. Perfect” and you’ll have a much better time in life.
Until next time,
-Nick Thomas
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