I recently ran across an article entitled “It’s true: all the taken men are best” (written by Andy Coghlan and posted on the NewScientist website on August 17, 2009), and I decided to add my own comments on this topic.
Without getting into the mechanics of the research study which the article addresses, the gist of their findings was that women are far more likely to be attracted to a guy whom they believe is already taken than to that same guy if they believe him to be unattached.
Could that really be true? Absolutely!
The fact is that women enjoy few things better than taking a man away from another woman. And it’s not a new concept.
It’s called “social proof”
It works like this: when we’re uncertain how to respond in any given situation, we’re hard-wired by evolution to look to those around us to see how they are responding to the situation … and then respond the same way ourselves.
It’s easy to demonstrate this.
For example, if you’re walking down the street and you come upon 10 or 12 people standing there looking toward the sky, what will be your own response? You’ll stop and look up too.
Advertisers learned about this human quirk several decades ago. If they’re selling beer, they’re likely to use actors in their ad who look like “Joe Six-Pack”. If they’re selling floor wax, they’re likely to use actresses in their ad who look like typical housewives.
Why? Because it works
The more closely the people in the ad look, dress and act like you, the more likely you will be to follow their lead and use the advertised product or service.
We’ve known for many years that women are wired that same way when it comes to evaluating how “good a catch” a new guy is: the more that other women seem attracted to him, the more that she’s likely to also be attracted to him.
That’s easy to demonstrate also.
The next time you’re at a party and you meet a new woman, confide to her that you haven’t had a date in two years. And then watch how quickly her interest level wanes. If none of the other women who have looked you over in the past couple of years has been impressed, then she won’t be either.
The reverse also works
Give the impression that you’re in demand and the women you meet will find you to be more desirable. But it’s not enough to tell women that you’re getting more tail than a toilet seat … that’s the sort of boasting that guys who are not getting any action will do.
And women will see right through that approach.
To get better results, you’ll need to behave the way that guys who do well with women behave. And that can be taught.
Stay tuned,
Mack Doppler
